🐾 Buster’s Blog Corner: “Murder, Mice, and Moisturizer”

Date: April 24
Location: My pink velvet perch at The Clip Joint

Greetings, humans and lesser beings.

It is I, Buster Keaton, feline extraordinaire and co-sleuth of the one and only Jenni Styles. While she’s busy solving crimes and managing bangs, I’ve decided it’s high time I got some editorial control around here. Welcome to my corner. It smells faintly of tuna and justice.

Now, let’s talk about the recent chaos.

We had a body—yes, a real one—buried in a sandcastle. Can you imagine the audacity? If I did that with a mouse toy, I’d get a lecture. But when humans do it, suddenly it’s a “mystery.”

Anyway, here are a few of my observations from the case:

  • Suspicious smells at the spa? Called it.

  • Cucumber water is just water with disappointment in it.

  • I knocked over one (okay, three) potted plant and suddenly I’m “disruptive.”

  • I also uncovered a phone. You're welcome.

And before anyone forgets I leapt dramatically into steam fog to help crack this case. The fact that no one filmed it for a heroic slow-mo reel is the real crime.

Buster’s Bonus Tips:

  • Never trust someone who doesn’t like cats. Or carbs.

  • If your moisturizer smells like betrayal and citrus, it probably is.

  • Always sleep with one eye open. Preferably on a cashmere throw.

Until next time, keep your claws sharp and your gossip sharper.

With grace and cat hair,
Buster Keaton 🐾

🐾 Buster’s Blog Corner: “A Quick Claw-sation with Jenni Styles”

Date: April 24
Location: The front window of The Clip Joint, where I reign like a furry sun god.

Today, dear readers, I decided it was time to sit down with the woman behind the scissors—and the sleuthing—Miss Jenni Styles herself. She thinks she runs this salon. We all know the truth.

So I ambushed her mid-latte with a few hard-hitting questions.

🕵️‍♂️ Buster: Jenni, tell the people—what’s harder: cutting bangs on a moving toddler, or solving a murder?

💇‍♀️ Jenni: Honestly? The toddler. The murder suspects don’t usually cry and wipe popsicle juice in my hair.

🕵️‍♂️ Buster: How does it feel knowing your cat is smarter than half the police force?

💇‍♀️ Jenni: Half? That’s generous. You’ve cracked more clues with your tail than most of them with a whiteboard.

🕵️‍♂️ Buster: Favorite part of being a small-town stylist-slash-detective?

💇‍♀️ Jenni: Honestly? It’s the community. And the secrets. And occasionally making Officer Luke blush.

🕵️‍♂️ Buster: …Are you flirting with him or solving crimes?

💇‍♀️ Jenni: Why not both?

🕵️‍♂️ Buster: Final question: Tuna treats or chicken?

💇‍♀️ Jenni: You know I’m a vegetarian.

🕵️‍♂️ Buster: That wasn’t for you, it was a test. You passed. (But bring me chicken.)

That’s all for today, humans. Next time I might rate the town’s comfiest hiding spots or share my new beauty column: “If I Lick It, It’s Clean.”

Stay suspicious,
Buster Keaton 🐾

🐾 Buster’s Blog Corner:

“My Crime-Fighting Beauty Routine”
Date: April 24
Location: On the front counter at The Clip Joint, licking my paw like it owes me rent.

Greetings, fans, foes, and confused hair clients. It’s me—Buster Keaton, the Persian prince of pink salons and crime scene chic.

You think catching criminals and napping in sunbeams just happens? No, darling. It takes a routine. So today, I’m sharing my top-secret crime-fighting beauty regimen that keeps me sleek, sharp, and suspiciously perfect.

🛁 1. The Fluff Check

Every morning, I start with a full-body fluff inspection. If my tail isn’t giving “power swoosh,” I’m not ready to interrogate anyone. Static? Unacceptable. I roll across Jenni’s best throw pillows until I reach maximum puff.

✨ Beauty tip: Pillow fluffing also preps your claws for dramatic accusations.

🧼 2. Signature Scent

I don’t do “eau de litter box.” My scent is a complex blend of cucumber detangler, vanilla dry shampoo, and a hint of mystery. Occasionally I rub against the rosemary plant outside. Why? Because it says detective but whispers herbal danger.

✨ Beauty tip: Smell innocent. Never be innocent.

💅 3. Claw Care & Combat Prep

Manicures? Please. These claws are registered plot devices. I sharpen them on Jenni’s hairbrush (don’t tell her), then test them on a suspect’s pant leg. If I snag a thread, they’re ready for action.

✨ Beauty tip: A well-placed paw swipe can say what words cannot.

😼 4. The “Detective Stare”

Grooming is internal too. I spend ten minutes daily perfecting my “I know what you did” look in the mirror. Combine that with a slow blink and boom—confession time.

✨ Beauty tip: Never break eye contact. Unless it’s to dramatically clean your shoulder mid-interrogation.

🧴 5. Hydration & Gossip

While Jenni sips her oat milk latte, I hydrate with filtered water served in a cut-crystal dish. I eavesdrop on salon gossip, which is the real reason I stay looking young: drama is exfoliating.

✨ Beauty tip: Always drink with one ear turned toward the juiciest conversation.

And that’s the secret, darlings. Sleek fur, sharp claws, and a steady stream of small-town secrets. I stay ready, so I never have to get ready.

Stay fierce,
Buster Keaton 🐾

🐾 Buster’s Blog Corner:

“Flirting or Felony? A Cat’s Guide to Suspicious Behavior”
Date: April 24
Location: High atop Jenni’s hairdryer station, silently judging everyone.

Ah, the eternal question: is that person being charmingly flirty… or deeply suspicious?

Lucky for you, I’m an expert in both courtship and crime-solving. Here’s my official guide to telling the difference—because there’s a thin line between “cute wink” and “cover-up.”

😸 Flirting: Compliments your highlights.

🚨 Suspicious: Knows exactly what time you leave the salon and mentions it casually.

✨ Buster’s Call: If someone notices your balayage, cool. If they’ve memorized your routine? I’m already sniffing their bag for evidence.

😸 Flirting: Brings you a coffee.

🚨 Suspicious: “Accidentally” brings two and claims one’s for a friend who never arrives.

✨ Buster’s Call: Free lattes are great. But if that second coffee’s a prop in a cover story, you best believe I’m sticking a paw in it to test for poison.

😸 Flirting: Laughs at your jokes, even the bad ones.

🚨 Suspicious: Laughs way too hard, then quickly changes the subject when questioned.

✨ Buster’s Call: Real fans enjoy my comedy. Fake fans are hiding something—and it’s probably in their oversized purse.

😸 Flirting: Asks about your cat.

🚨 Suspicious: Asks if your cat ever "sees things" or "acts like he knows secrets.”

✨ Buster’s Call: Yes, I do know secrets, and now I know yours. Keep your witchy vibes to yourself, Brenda.

😸 Flirting: Touches your arm during a story.

🚨 Suspicious: Avoids eye contact, sweats under an AC vent, and suddenly needs to leave when Officer Luke walks in.

✨ Buster’s Call: Arm touch? Harmless. Fleeing the scene mid-mani/pedi? That’s called a red flag with a glitter top coat.

Final Verdict:

If your date smells like coconut sunscreen and guilt, I say: hiss once, blink twice, and keep your claws sharp. 🐾

Stay charming, stay suspicious,
Buster Keaton
Local Style Icon / Amateur Polygraph Machine